Crazy K's best friend Diane returned from New York City after settling her criminal charges, only to have Jeani remark loudly about how Diane, a tall, skinny lesbian, had previously been designated as "unfuckable." 

Apparently, we were all entered into a high-school type game without our knowledge, when the vicious team from Welch took over someone else's criminal investigation. They'd been matching us up for years, based on physical appearance and attractive qualities, but were never very successful.